The days are getting longer, the weather is getting warmer, and love is in the air! Valentine’s Day was only a short while ago, and this is often a time when couples decide to move in together. And while this can be an exciting time, it can also be very stressful. Trying to combine two households into one, compromising on what will be brought into the new home, and what won’t, can feel very overwhelming.
Couple Communication
Successfully sharing a home with another person comes down to one important skill: communication. Each person must feel like their opinion matters and that they can have a say in what comes into, stays, or goes out of the home.
If there is an imbalance or feelings of “mine versus yours”, this could be a recipe for disaster.
We all have different communication styles, habits, values, and emotional attachments to various things. When decluttering a space with a partner, it can sometimes feel personal. If one partner has an emotional attachment to an item that the other doesn’t see any value in, it can bring up many emotions.
Discussing what is important to each of you before moving in together will help set expectations and clear boundaries. For example, one partner may value a minimalist style with hidden storage, while the other partner may value keeping and displaying sentimental items. Discussing what each of your visions is for your home and coming to a compromise beforehand, if necessary, is very important.
Practical Decluttering
It is inevitable to end up with duplicates (or triplicates) of dishes, cookware, linen and furniture, when combining households. So how do you handle this? The first, and possibly most important consideration, is space limitations. Living in Vancouver, while it has many perks, also comes with smaller living spaces, less indoor storage, and often a lack of garage/shed/yard space. This will largely dictate whether you can store any duplicate items or will need to downsize.
The second thing to consider is how often you use items such as small appliances (coffee makers, airfryers, toasters, blenders, etc.). If used often, items will inevitably need to be replaced, so if you’ve got a perfectly good duplicate and the space to store it, that would be your best bet. If you don’t have the space to store it, then consider donating or selling it, and when you need a new one, you can just replace it.
The next thing would be to decide whether you’ve been keeping items for sentimental or practical reasons. If an item is no longer practical, but you’ve kept it purely for sentimental reasons, it may be time to consider freeing up the space it takes up. To help with the emotions people often feel when decluttering, keep one or two sentimental items instead of many. Take pictures of items before you donate them, to keep the memories, and reframe your thoughts: decluttering isn’t about loss, but about making space for what’s to come.
To help you let go, think of it as keeping the best, not the most. When you have limited space, let go of all the “just in case” items. Clutter causes chaos and stress, even if items are sentimental. Once you let go, you’ll realize how much better you feel.
Decluttering Strategies to Reduce Conflict
Before moving in together, ensure each partner declutters their own items. This will allow the time and space necessary for each person to let go of items without feeling judged or pressured, and also allow time to deal with any emotions that may come up with sentimental items.
Once that is complete, discuss the items you each have, by category, such as books, kitchen items, furniture, etc., then decide together which items will be used in your new shared home.
After you’ve moved in together and unpacked, if you still find there are too many things, decide together what can be stored, donated or tossed out.
When handled respectfully, decluttering together can strengthen your bond with each other.
Setting up Shared Systems that Work
The next important step is to set up your home in a way that works for both partners. Agreeing on where items you use every day will live, how often your spaces, such as the kitchen, bathroom, and entryway, will be tidied, and how you will share storage spaces, such as drawers and closets, will prevent frustration from building up.
Some important zones to consider setting up are:
Entryway: utilizing organizing and storage solutions for keys, bags, shoes, and jackets;
Bathroom: how is the cupboard/drawer space being used? Will you be using countertop storage bins or keep everything out of sight?
Kitchen: to avoid clutter creep, such as flyers, receipts and mail from piling up on the counter, will you use a dedicated basket, or even make a habit of tossing items in the recycling bin immediately?
While using these tips will help when combining households, getting professional help is even better. Working with a professional organizer will help ensure a smooth transition from two households to one cohesive, functioning home.
Our team of professional organizers will work with each partner before your move to help declutter and set up your new shared home with systems that work for both of you. We can even help you pack and move to make this big change less scary and more exciting. Let us take the stress away and help you start this newest chapter of your life on the right foot!
Contact our team of professional organizers in Vancouver to help get you on the right track and meet your 2026 organizing goals.
We offer free phone or video call consultations, or book a 30-minute in-person consultation for $50+tax.
You can also send us videos of the areas you need help with via WhatsApp at 604-446-3939, and we would be happy to provide you with an estimate.
