How to Live with a Disorganized Partner
Some of my clients have shared that their loved ones are creating a constant mess in their place while my clients are making an effort to keep it organized. Co-habitating with someone who creates chaos around themselves makes the place difficult to enjoy. It can be stressful and frustrating to come home after busy day to your loved one amidst a messy house.
I am lucky that my husband maintains a level of organization at our home. But what to do with those who refuse or don’t care at all? There are three ways to deal with a disorganized partner:
1. Help Them Get Organized
If they are interested or willing to get organized that is wonderful.
Remember you can’t make anyone do something against their will. People only change when a personal goal is driving them. Also, you can help them by asking questions: “What is the clutter costing you?”
Maybe your loved one is always late on paying bills, parking tickets, losing tax return cheques? It feels frustrating when you realize that you didn’t deposit that cheque a few years ago and money was wasted.
In the end clutter costs money and time by constantly having to search for things. When they realize it’s important to get organized there is a chance they will need your help. If they trust you to work together on this you should be gentle with them and let them make their decisions on what to keep or let go. You are there to support them and be their assistant. Tell them that decluttering is not about getting rid of stuff but about finding what you truly love, use, enjoy and then finding permanent home for those things. Cheer them up and keep them focused, energized and do one room at a time. Set a time and work in 2 to 4 hour sessions with a small brake.
2. Be An Example For Your Significant Other
You can be a great example for your loved one on how you keep your stuff organized. Sometimes when the messy spouse sees how nice and clean your space is and how much more functional you have made it with your organizing efforts, he or she will be inspired to work on his or her own space.
3. Let Them Be
When you see that you have tried everything and your spouse is not interested in getting organized for different reasons. You can agree to have common areas in order and his or her belongings will be in designated areas like office space, garage. Place containers to catch the items in the spots where your loved one usually drops things. Let them hide their clutter exactly where they put it. If they can’t do it themselves then go ahead and do it yourself.
And remember, you are not alone you can always call Harmony Home Organizing and we can help your partner to get organized.